Dear French President Emmanuel Macron,

The lady you spoke to on the phone, Kamala Harris does not represent us, The People Of The United States, nor our God. She also doesn’t really believe in democracy. Kamala is an atheistic communist. We elected President Donald Trump. Basically, Kamala is squatting on National Parks Property and – because of a glitch in Homeland Security, she hasn’t been evicted yet. She loves starting riots and pretending to be Vice President; but we’re sorry she bothered you. It won’t happen again.

I’m sorry our FakeNews Media has misinformed you. They are merely the for-profit circus of the most ignorant, and must not be misconstrued as to accurately represent anything whatsoever.

This is America’s Man’s Man, Your General In The Culture War.

Don’t feel bad; I mean, at least you didn’t marry Meghan Markle.

P.S.: Twitter is evil, and it intentionally helped sabotage our 2020 Presidential Elections. Please stop using Twitter, as your e-fraternizing with American terrorists is noted by America’s Man’s Man. Oh, and you may want to seriously limit your television intake. The idiot box is clearly corrupting you. But hey, look at America.

Don’t commit illegal violence.